curious?

Seeing as this is my first entry, I don't know how to go about wording this. Do I even serve a purpose?

I've been questioning a lot of things recently: What is life all about? Do I have a purpose? What role do I play in this 'small' world of ours?

Right now I feel like I'm lost. Like I can only give a half-hearted answer to these questions. I don't know what I want to do with my life after college and my graduation date is slowly creeping up onto me.

I always thought that if I just work hard and trust in اللهُ سبحانه وتعالى (Allah, Glorified and Exalted) that everything would work out fine. Don't get me wrong—I certaintly haven't lost faith, but I don't feel like everything is working out how I had visioned. I'm in my Junior year of college now with nothing to show for it. I had a fall out with computer science and I don't really know what direction life is taking me right now.

I know that I want to leave an impact on this world by helping others. Yet, at times, I don't even feel like I can help myself.

After I started thinking about projects to work on I remembered that I've always wanted my own public blog. I feel like this fits me better though. A public journal for others to read and reflect on.

I know I've been beating around the bush and jumping here and there, it's all intentional. Once I'm ready I'll 'speak' a lot more about it.

I don't know what I'll talk about in my future entries, maybe I'll use this as a way to get my words 'heard' without actually having to talk to anyone.

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@gettysburgdream

I find it pretty thought-provoking how some people don't believe in a higher power.

Observe.

These people say: "I need signs of God's existence." Are we not enough proof? The device you're reading this on, does it not have a manufacturer? All the little intricate details that work together to make your device function—did they come from nothing?

Others will say: "I need evidence of God's existence." Is the evidence not abundant? Who do you think instilled in us the belief in a higher power? Be that as it may, it's all bogus.

Isn't it interesting how these people think they can cause corruption and not be held accountable for their deeds? They say: "Eternal damnation is unjust and inhumane", but where do they get their morality from?

Or those that say they believe, but associate partners with God. How can they associate God with others? It doesn't befit God to have partners. God is above all 'his' creation.

Isn't it apparent that God is one, all-encompassing, and dependent on no one? Yet some claim: "God is a figment of human imagination." Do they really believe we came from nothing, or perhaps evolution?

Do you know how precious your life is? Did you know that most people that could exist, will never experience life? Now who do you thank for your life... your parents? And do they thank their parents, who then thanked theirs?

They don't believe in life after death, and they say this 'punishment' isn't real. Why? Hypothetically, what if it IS real. Then what? Who are you going to blame? The only thing promised in this life is death. Doesn't that lead you to question: What's the purpose of life? What's going to happen to me after I die?

I had these questions a lot in ######## ######, but I usually brushed them off. Maybe I'm thinking too much, and they aren't thinking enough.

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@gettysburgdream